Please would you be able to give me some guidance on dealing with a jealous ex-partner who apparently is a soul mate and has a karma link.
We have a 15 year old son and I have always tried to keep the peace from the start and was a bit of a people pleaser, however, the moment I put in boundaries when needed I am bullied and downed by him and his mother and labelled crazy and guilty. An example of their way – on the night before burying my mother 3 years ago, myex verbally attacked me and on the evening after the burial, his mother verbally attacked me because they felt they had been left out on the funeral!!
I did fear him and feared losing my son which is why I was the peacekeeper. Recently he has tried again to control me and was very abusive to me in my own home in front of my 7 year old daughter and left my property shouting abuse at me, I’ve just moved in too and I am sorry to the neighbours if they heard this!
So I am now going to take charge and be brave and put this in its place. I have booked to see a solicitor and am asking my guides to help me. I live on my own with my two children and have felt vulnerable. Men seem to be struggling at the moment with power and ego- my father and my brother again tried to down me and all of this behaviour is unprovoked. I’ve asked that it be handed over to the universe as this is old energy that is dragging me down and I am now very much a light 5th dimensional person.
I see that you have done work on bullies and felt that you would be qualified to give me some good advice.
Many thanks and Merry Christmas
Dear Kate thank you for your letter, you speak for many woman (and men) who are abused by their partners current and past. From a reality perspective I agree that you need to get yourself covered by the law and seeing your solicitor sets that up. From a healer’s perspective going to your solicitor is a positive intention that speaks to the universe of your desire to be free from this man and his attitude, so it’s a great start.
You will also need to clear all promises, vows, contracts etc. that you have made with him. When we fall in love we often make statements such as “I will love you for ever and ever” or “We are made to be as one forever”, “I will be with you till I die” and so on. You may well have made similar promises in past lives as you feel karmic connections to this man. You can clear all of these from this and previous lives by simply stating your intention to dissolve them.
Clearing karmic ties:
Here is a simple process to follow:
Protect your energy: Visualise yourself surrounded by the Blue Flame of Archangel Michael to protect and seal your energy or say out loud “I surround myself and my family with the Blue Flame of Archangel Michael to protect and seal my energy now right now, right now.”
Clear the karmic bonds:
Tie a cotton thread around your wrist to symbolise your connection to your ex.
Say out loud four times: “I release and dissolve all vows, promises and contracts that no longer serve my highest good that bind me in any way to …….. (his name) and I dissolve them now, right now, right now.”
Then say out loud four times: “I release and dissolve all karma between me and ………………… (his name) and I set myself free from his control.” Break the thread with the intention of releasing his control over you.
To gain more power
To enhance your personal power to be in control and to be able to be strong with your choices, in other words your will power, visualise beams of golden light flowing from the sun, that is the strongest and most powerful energy of our universe, and allow them to flow into your solar plexus, giving you strength of purpose and determination. Spiritually you are connecting to the Solar Logos which is the spiritual power of the sun and the solar system.
The lesson in this experience
This is a lesson for you to be in your own power and to make your own decisions, take self-responsibility and direct the way your life goes forward. It seems you have really got the message, bless you. Well done. By deciding that you don’t want to be bullied anymore and doing something about the situation you have set the change of direction into motion and action.
When you have been bullied and dominated by another person over a period of time, you will be holding issues of low self-esteem, feeling worthless and believe that you are less than your abuser. You may feel so in awe of their power that you feel completely powerless and unable to resist their strength and dominance. So setting yourself free will take courage and you may find that you will take two steps forward and one back as you summon the strength to make the change. Don’t give up and lose heart.
- Bullies are covering their own sense of inadequacy and are using you to boost their personal power and self-esteem.
- You are as good and equal to anyone – we are all unique but the differences between us do not make one person “better” than another, just different. We have different aspects, skills, personalities and strengths so that we can achieve different things in life so value your differences rather than look down on them.
- Your spirit is and was created with love and of love and this is what you will always be – you just need to find this inside you and accept it.
- You have to be the role model that others follow on how to treat you. The moment you start to value yourself others will do so too.
So Kate, I hope this gives you some heart to continue your journey of self-empowerment, self-love and freedom from the abuse you have suffered, bless you.
Love and blessings & A BIG HUG!
p.s. There is more advice on this subject in my book The Power of You published by Piatkus/Little Brown books available from bookstores, as a book or e-book from Amazon.co.uk and from my shop